- me half-way through shaving one leg:
i dont want to do this anymore
If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate endings and watch them panic again as they all try to find the last ending.
This is perfect.
(via notduhmermaid)
half the time when people are talking i don’t even know what’s going on so i just stand there and smile and act like i understand
(Source: snorlaxatives, via amillionhedgehogs)













